if only i could take away the tears and the pain that you're feeling right now. how it hurts my heart to know that you're so broken, that you're life seems to be in shambles. if i could, i'd super glue the pieces back together. if only there was a way to go back in time to where decisions were made, lies were told, deceit was birthed and denial was undeniable. to think that i once broke trust in the same way - i know what it does to people, i know how it makes people feel, i know the pain it causes. looking at the sin of others makes me realize how far off i am from where i should be. i cannot look at someone else and judge with my flesh, because i am just as guilty as any other sinner in this world. i have to use a righteous and spirit guided judgment that is in love, pointing the sinner back to the cross.
i realize that we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God, this is why i cannot deny my own wretchedness. i know where i am and how far i should be. my discipline is lacking, my passion is fading, the distractions have diminished so now its just a lack of motivation. i miss wednesday nights, i miss my hour long talks with a bridesmaid about the Lord. how i wish my love and i would spend more time focused and devoted to bible study and praise and worship. if only i felt like we were at the church we should be at. look at all these "if only" excuses. "Jesus take the wheel. i'm letting go, give me one more chance. save me from this road i'm on." i just need to do it, i need to stop dwelling on the fact that i'm no where near where i should be, i need to just do it. thats what i'll do. i'll update this with how things go. agape.
i realize that we all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God, this is why i cannot deny my own wretchedness. i know where i am and how far i should be. my discipline is lacking, my passion is fading, the distractions have diminished so now its just a lack of motivation. i miss wednesday nights, i miss my hour long talks with a bridesmaid about the Lord. how i wish my love and i would spend more time focused and devoted to bible study and praise and worship. if only i felt like we were at the church we should be at. look at all these "if only" excuses. "Jesus take the wheel. i'm letting go, give me one more chance. save me from this road i'm on." i just need to do it, i need to stop dwelling on the fact that i'm no where near where i should be, i need to just do it. thats what i'll do. i'll update this with how things go. agape.
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